Even My Dream Self is Depressed
I’m still struggling quite a bit. Feeling lethargic, numb, and exhausted all the time. Still not wanting to get out of bed, even though I’m not finding much refuge in sleep either, since my dreams the...
View ArticleI Hate Disappointing People
You ever go to a doctor’s appointment and feel like you somehow disappointed them? That’s how I’m feeling today. I went to see my psychiatrist and while he didn’t say anything overly negative or mean,...
View ArticlePoetry: Spectre of Depression
I wish you could see the spectre of depression haunting my days… dragging his knuckles through the miry muck and leaving a trail of icy numbness behind. (Poetry by Maranda Russell, marandarussell.com)
View ArticlePoetry: Paper Doll
I’m a paper doll with third degree burns. Dress me up, make me pretty, and please, simply ignore all the raw, peeling flesh falling onto the floor. (Poetry by Maranda Russell, marandarussell.com)
View ArticleSSDI Hearing Update
Sorry I didn’t update you all yesterday after the hearing, but I was just too exhausted mentally, emotionally, and physically after the stress of the day. Overall, I think the hearing went ok. It...
View ArticlePoetry: Narcissistic Games
She could never let me sleep. That would put us on equal footing and allow me to be fully awake and aware. Instead, she would sneak into my room, shake me awake and cry loud, calculated tears while I...
View ArticleAfraid of Living
I am not afraid to die – but I am not yet unafraid of living. I’m not sure I have ever written truer words than the 3-line poem above. This little gem came to me while taking a bath last night, so I...
View ArticlePoetry: Second First Love
I hated you the first time we met. You had replaced my old love before I had the chance to even say goodbye. You dared to appear right as he vanished – and for that you had to take the blame.
View ArticlePoetry: Unspeakable Childhood
‘Twas horrible to think that she suffered an unspeakable childhood. Every day they reopened the contentions – old ones that she could not tear away. Mischief and dread became more likely than right...
View ArticlePoetry (Haiku) – Grow Up
Grow up, they all say But when I try to plant roots they poison the soil (Written for a #haikudaily tag on Twitter, theme was “grow”)
View ArticleGhost Hunting and Ear Infections
Man, I’m pretty bummed today. I was supposed to go ghost hunting at a local cemetery with a paranormal investigation group, but yesterday my earache turned into a raging ear infection and between the...
View ArticlePoetry – Stuck
Stuck not sure where to go so many roads limited time stalled pick foot up put back down repeat. Am I moving forward or standing still? The shadows move but my footprints stay right here.
View ArticlePoetry – Killing My Cat
Monday appointment 3pm $41 for the medicine of death $90 to turn you to ash cancer is no respecter of species Spyder, what would you say if you knew what was coming? The question haunts me and you...
View ArticlePoetry – Let Me Try Not to Think
Let me try not to think. I want to remain dimly conscious of the fact that the bravest man amongst us will never overcome the innate fear he harbors towards himself.
View Article2 Emotional Abstract Expressionism Artworks
I created these two emotionally charged ACEO abstract artworks not long ago. The first was sort of a cry of frustration when I was having trouble writing new poetry that I felt was any good: This...
View ArticlePoetry – Someone Else
I thought I wanted to be an actress, but now I realize, I only wanted the chance to be someone else.
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